. . . being a “vegetable” for three weeks lead me to speak of “nothing” — everywhere we turn, another addiction … but we love them, and so we don’t call them addictions … we call them “interests” … and they help us forget reality … a reality where we don’t count … a reality where words don’t exist … where there is no “where” … tabula rasa … or if you still want “something” —> the School of No Media …

BRAINBLEED(s) - 3 weeks of ICU to UNLEARN

the particular knowLEDGE of forgetting to even be (but fortunate enough to be able to report about it)

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Clear(er) Damage – Yet Still in the Dark

Posted by piermar2 on December 16, 2023
Posted in: Uncategorized.

What I feel is typically physical and fleeting (various sensations around the brain); what doctors see is different.
Finally, almost two months later, a nurse (why not a doctor?) tells me by comparing three CT scans, how the impact of the fall, through the helmet, generated some blood inside my brain.

It is visible… and yet, no one knows exactly how this will manifest itself in the future.

“Talk to your GP if you notice something new.”

The good news is that the blood has not expanded. The not-so-great news is that the blood is still there and what remains prevents some part of the brain to function – my understanding in a quick summary that typically doesn’t spell out the ramifications: “either you will know if something is not right, or you won’t.”

“And by the way, the book on brain injury you were given may not be that relevant to you” – a guessing game, or is it the advice given to a child with something some adults (somewhere) may understand in a deeper way. Or have I reached the limits of science/medicine and no one wants to acknowledge that?
Is this what they could be saying: “I am sorry, we would like to help you further, but we just don’t know.”

The arrow points to the area with blood.


The fantastic news following one more clavicle X-Ray is that I can go back to the pool – we swimmers are used to fighting against the elements! If I die, it may be in the water!

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